With a history of tourism stretching back more than a millennium, Cozumel is an old pro at entertaining. The lone town, San Miguel, has grown an enjoyable collection of restaurants, bars and souvenir shops. The island offers outstanding snorkeling and diving, wide sandy beaches, adventurous attractions and even some genuine — if diminutive — Maya temples. These were dedicated to the goddess Ix Chel and, when the Spanish arrived, Maya women were still making the pilgrimage to Cozumel to ask her blessing for a fruitful marriage.
Whether these weekends were also the beginning of Cozumel's reputation as a hearty party town is lost to history. Today it's cruise passengers who flock to this small spit of sand and limestone separated from the Yucatán Peninsula by a narrow channel. The island's eastern side faces the Gulf of Mexico and is home to deserted beaches while the west side is developed, hosting three cruise ship piers within walking distance of San Miguel.
Souvenir shops proffer a plethora of craft goods shipped in from the interior — silver work in particular. The sun is hot, the drinks are cold and the waters, crystal clear.
Tip: Taxis are abundant; just make sure you get the rate before you roll. If not, you may be surprised by an inflated fare.
Adventurer
If you go to Cozumel, you have to get in the water. This is the north end of the world's second-largest barrier reef. The best diving is on the protected west side, and the water is usually clear; so clear that at 100-feet you'll swear you're at 60 (watch those gauges). Take a one-tank dive on shallow Paradise Reef with Aqua Safari (Av. Rafael Melgar, a block from the Punta Langosta cruise pier), or a longer two-tank dive to one of the deep — and steep — reefs such as Colombia or world-famous Palancar.
If you're not an aquaholic, pick up a car, cross the Transversal highway, stop at the San Gervasio Maya site and then tour the wild east side's beer-and-taco joints, open beaches and museum. Reserve your car online beforehand, take all of the insurance coverage and watch out for wild taxi drivers, especially in San Miguel. Or you can hire a cab to drive you (about $60 for four hours) and let him worry. To see big Maya ruins, book a full-day tour to Tulum on the mainland.
Entertain Me
Cozumel is a small island and San Miguel is a small town, but they have a well-earned reputation for partying, often fueled by cases of Corona and quarts of tequila. The clubs around the town square on Rafael Melgar attract local residents, dive masters and tourists mixing it up on the dance floor at clubs like longtime favorite Neptuno — a concert club with blasting sound — and the newer Room Service which features three floors playing different styles of music and lots of young minglers.
The area near the cruise terminal is tourist territory, with cruisers and others packing the venerable Carlos 'n' Charlies and Senor Frogs. A more sedate experience can be had at Isla Pasíon, an all-inclusive private beach club with food, drinks and transportation provided. You can sail serenely in a catamaran or tear up the ocean on the way over in the Twister, a mega-horsepower speedboat.
Family
Snag a taxi and visit Chankanaab Lagoon (km 9, Av. Rafael Melgar). Loll in the buttery warm natural lagoon or book a personal encounter with a dolphin, a manatee or (oddly, since they're not native) sea lions. There are snorkeling trails, a walking trail with a little Mexican history mixed in and decent food. You can take an underwater tour of the island's world-famous reefs without getting wet in the Atlantis Submarine. Cruise 100- feet deep along the island's stunning west wall on the 40-minute ride.
You could spend most of the day deciding just which options to take at EcoParque Cuzam. This place has a zipline, paintball fields, ATV tours, horses and two pools scattered across its tropically landscaped grounds. Once you get the butterflies out of your stomach from screaming down the jungle zipline, you can chow down on tacos in the poolside palapa.
Foodie
If you manage to elude the snare of Carlos 'n Charlie's bar food and XXL margaritas, San Miguel has restaurants serving authentic Mexican food. Bear in mind this is the east coast, so if you're a fan of Tex-Mex, Yucatécan food is going to be different. Tacos al pastor are a specialty. These are rotisserie roasted like a Greek gyro, but instead of lamb, the meat is usually pork. Las Otates (Avenida 15) serves authentic tacos al pastor on plastic tables in an open-air, tin-roofed building. You can fill-up for $10.
For more atmosphere and English-speaking staff, La Mission (two blocks from the waterfront on Av. Rafael Melgar) offers traditional style Mexican food in a roofed courtyard with white tablecloths. For something completely different — and not available back home — consider Cuban products. La Casa del Habano serves real Montecristo and Romeo y Julieta cigars and Havana Club rum (not the "Havana Club" sold by Bacardi in the U.S.) at reasonable prices. The atmosphere is more sports bar than fine dining, but the place is very close to the ferry port on the main plaza in San Miguel.
Luxury Lover
Golf at the Cozumel Country Club (Carretera Costera Norte, KM 6.5) on a Nicklaus Design course. Arguably the best food-and-nightlife locale on the island is Buccanos at Night (in the Club Cozumel Caribe hotel north of town; take a taxi). The place is right on the beach, has a fabulous atmosphere and excellent food. Although pricey, Buccanos is also a beach club. If you feel like being pampered, just land here for the day, sun and swim/snorkel/parasail/get a massage, then feast from an international-style menu with a Mexican twist (think lobster tostadas and cilantro-agave honey).
Romantic
A full-day pass at Mr. Sancho's Beach Club (km 15 Av. Rafael Melgar) let's you do it all: laze on the beach, paddle kayaks, eat and drink beachside or in the pool, play volleyball. Upgrade for a massage, jungle ATV tour or horseback riding on the beach. If that sounds like too much work, take a long lunch at Casa Mission (Av. 55 at Av. Juarez). Don't confuse this with La Mission (same owner, different location). Casa Mission, a former hacienda, has impeccably landscaped grounds and classic Mexican Colonial architectural details — tile, wrought iron, fountains — plus wonderful food. Order the "sexy coffee" afterwards to see "sparks" fly . At tableside, your waiter mixes ice cream and hot coffee, adds brandy and Kahlua to a pair of creamers, lights the alcohol and pours the flaming liquid back and forth. When the alcohol burns off, it's added to your glass coffee mug.
Wallet Watcher
Hit the Mercado (Av. 25 and Rosado Salas) in San Miguel; it costs nothing to browse wonderful hand crafts brought here from the interior: black Oaxacan pottery, glassware, folk art, leather goods and handmade silver jewelry. There are high-end international brand stores, too, especially around the waterfront Plaza del Sol, but the best values are in smaller shops scattered between there and the Mercado, some with no names. When you've worked up a sufficient appetite, follow your nose to one of the comida corrida (food on the run) stalls nearby and eat real Mexican food for far less than you'd spend at Hard Rock or Carlos n Charlies.
--Steve Blount is the former editor of Caribbean Travel & Life, Florida Travel & Life and Scuba Diving. thedigitalmarketingninja.com